Grief Tearbook: Love is a Choice Made Daily

It seemed like a good idea to take everyone to the mall.

My son was graduating from high school and I was in the midst of being separated from my husband.  I had a cordial relationship of many years with my in-laws, so it seemed natural that they should all be house guests for the graduation festivities.

My son and his grandma were thrilled at the thought of the excursion.  I felt good to have some place to go since it would have been somewhat awkward staying home.  We all got out of the car.  Then it hit!  The candle shop had always held great fascination for me and I raced ahead to have more time to see all the amazing items.  One candle caught my attention for its poetic beauty.  Then I stood, mesmerized, realizing it said, “Love is Forever.”

My heart was purely broken as I confronted yet once again the loss of my dream that the candle’s words could be true.  (The only gift from this was that it jump-started my grief process but it couldn’t have been at a more inopportune time.)

I found tears rushing down my face like an uncontrolled faucet.  I walked on ahead in an effort to look like I was window-shopping.  The windows reflected the pain in my face, and even the tears showed!

Somehow I got through the day, and even the visit — which  I knew would be the last one for the in-laws since the divorce was soon to come.  With the help of my sons and friends, ultimately I survived the period of transition from believing that love is forever to “Love is a choice made daily!”

Copyright by Hildra Tague. Contact the author for print or online republication.


About grantutor

Career educator in both public and private schools. Has tutored all ages. Writes about education, parenting, & seniors. Sings harmony with folk/rock group and a choir. Caregiver for spouse who dealt with Stage IV cancer. Happy person committed to nature and conservation of a green world.
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3 Responses to Grief Tearbook: Love is a Choice Made Daily

  1. Jana Smith says:

    When I divorced my children’s father, I was able to keep his parents; not only for the sake of the children, but because there was a genuine love between they and I.
    They have both passed away now. My children are grown and I have grand children. And I am so glad my “ex” inlaws and I were able to keep our relationship seperate from mine and my ex husband’s relationship.
    People have often asked me how we did it…The only thing can figure is, we all wanted to remain friends; and so we found connection, and “family” outside of the “broken” marriage. I was a chosen daughter, and that connection did not change.
    And believe it or not, my ex-in-laws even liked and grew to love the man who I later married. And my new mother in law and my ex mother-in-law became came friends. And yes I have a wonderful love and friendship with my current mother-in law.
    Much love,


  2. Pingback: Grief Tearbook: The Price of Vegetables | Hildra Tague's Celebrations of Learning Blog

  3. Pingback: Grief Tearbook: A Pink Slip on Christmas Day | Hildra Tague's Celebrations of Learning Blog

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