Of These My Children: Bring Your Reindeer to Class

The rainy season was in full sway and Tree Land students were loving it. They were experts at finding those glorious puddles.

This small private school enjoyed the custom of walking in the rain when it wasn’t storming. Miss Landers would let the children line up at recess and take a Wet Walk on the long sidewalk, as long as the kids came prepared.

A new boy was confused. He told the teacher another guy had hollered at him the day before as he went to his car, “Bring your reindeer to class tomorrow.”  The instructor decided it was time to learn some more about weather, so she had the class think of weather words to put on the board. It looked like she just couldn’t get enough of that rainy day!

One girl said to her friends, “Wasn’t that downpour and puddles and splashes of mud enough already?” “No, now she’s talking about ‘raining cats and dogs’ and ‘rain coming down in sheets’ like we all need to hear more about it!”

Right about then Miss Landers added one more term to the list: “Rain Gear”.

Soon it was Writing time and since the board was full of weather words and phrases, the assignment was to include as many of them as possible in a story or weather report.

The room was quiet except for one guy who kept chatting. The teacher told him, “You need to get your concentration going.” He quipped, “What is this, a concentration camp?” At least he must have paid some attention in history last week.

Writing class was only the quiet before the storm. When Language began, so did the uproar. That silly teacher started talking about “the congregation of a verb”! A confident young scholar exclaimed, “What’s she trying to be, a preacher or something?” When things settled down to a low roar, she explained about the conjugation of a verb. Uh, it looked like all verbs were action verbs that day because the class was definitely active during that lesson!

In history students learned about citizenship. When the teacher told them they were automatically citizens if they were born in the U.S. one young man declared, “I’m not an American! I was born in New Hampshire!” Miss Landers made a note to teach about the 50 United States of America

After that ordeal, she looked tired. But she carried on, telling about the two parts of Congress. A curious girl asked, “I know we study that in English class, but what does a sentence have to do with Congress?” Two new words got added to the Vocabulary chart on the wall Senate and House.

Thank goodness, lunch time had come. The students loved to choose a picnic table and catch up on visiting, with a little yelling thrown in for good measure. One guy was mad at his mom since she said he was acting childish that morning. He sat tall and belted out, “I am manureAll my friends know that.”

Something made Miss Landers cough real hard. But when she recovered, she assured him she was glad he was trying to be mature.

A sweet gal bragged that her grandma was going to buy her a leper skin coat. That afternoon in science the kids played a game about animal names.  When the teacher’s turn came, she choose leopard.

One boy reminded the teacher to add his favorite animal gizzard bears. She remembered that he loved watching the old Grizzly Adams TV series.

Everyone loved the last class of the day. That crazy teacher made the students listen to something new each week. She called it “music appreciation.” This week’s selection was Rhapsody in Blue by George Gershwin. Several of the children agreed with an older guy who said he “never heard that rap before.” Maybe that should be called ‘classic rap’?

When the singing was over it was time to wrap up the day. 

As they left for their rides, one child bellered out, “It’s gonna rain again tomorrow so don’t forget to bring your reindeer to class!” That poor teacher collapsed in a heap. Her final act of the day was to scribble on the next day’s lesson plans to add rain gear to spelling list!


Copyright 2016 by Hildra Tague. Obtain permission for use online or in print.



About grantutor

Career educator in both public and private schools. Has tutored all ages. Writes about education, parenting, & seniors. Sings harmony with folk/rock group and a choir. Caregiver for spouse who dealt with Stage IV cancer. Happy person committed to nature and conservation of a green world.
This entry was posted in Education and Parenting, Of These My Children: Infamous Sayings of Insidious Intellects – Humor, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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